The Green-Eyed Monster in the Workplace (And How to Tame It)

It happens out of nowhere. You’re just hanging around in the office, minding your own business, scrolling through your emails when... Jane from cybersecurity posted about her fancy new promotion on LinkedIn. The balloons, the “so grateful for this opportunity” spiel, the 82 comments telling her how amazing she is. And then there it is: that little ping in your chest. You know the one.

Envy.

The green-eyed monster.

The tiny voice whispering, “Why isn’t that me?” or "When would it be me?" It’s a sucker punch to your confidence, and suddenly, what could have been a perfectly decent day feels like that 5K race you could not complete last month.

The truth is, almost everyone feels it at some point. Envy? It’s human. But here’s the catch: it doesn’t have to derail you from your career path. You can turn it into something productive, that pushes you forward instead of leaving you facedown in a pity party (or doom-scrolling LinkedIn until 2 AM).

Pull up a chair, grab your coffee or tea, and let’s figure out how to tame that pesky monster together.

Why Does Workplace Envy Happen?

Feeling envious isn’t some deep character flaw; it’s actually wired into us. Back in the cave days, envy helped people spot who had the largest pile of furs or the nicest campfire and think, “Alright, I want that too.” It was motivation fuel, pushing you to step up your game and secure your spot in the group.

Fast-forward to modern times, and those instincts didn’t vanish. Only now, instead of fighting over firewood, we’re competing over stuff like promotions, raises, and shiny work titles. Seeing someone else “win” can make you hyper-aware of what you think you’re missing. Your brain does this fun little thing where it zooms in on everything you lack and just… conveniently ignores your own wins.

But here’s the reality check you need to hear very loud and clear: just because someone shines doesn’t mean you’re dim. Their success doesn’t cancel out yours. Think of it like stars in the sky, we don’t look at one and go, “Ugh, that star is so bright, now all the others are useless.” (If stars can coexist, so can we.)

What to Do When the Green-Eyed Monster Shows Up

Alright, so you’ve identified that awful pang of envy. Now what? Here’s how to sideline it before it spirals into “I’m doomed, everything is terrible, and I’ll never catch up” thinking.

1) Pause and Get Real About Your Feelings

Yes, envy feels sticky, like you need to take a shower to clean your soul after feeling it, but bottling it up only makes it worse. Instead, call it out like, “Oh hey, there’s my ego being a little insecure again.” Admitting you’re feeling it doesn’t make you weak; it makes you self-aware. And fun fact, self-awareness is actually a workplace superpower.

Once you’ve acknowledged it, dig deeper. Are you jealous of Jane’s new job title, or is it really that you feel stuck in your own role? Is it about Jane at all, or are you just burnt out and in need of a confidence boost? Envy has a way of highlighting what you actually care about, so use it as a map to figure out what’s really bothering you.

2) Celebrate (Yes, Celebrate) Their Win

I get it. Clapping for someone else when you’re feeling insecure is like listening to nails on a chalkboard. But hear me out. When you genuinely celebrate someone else’s success, it shifts your brain from scarcity mode into abundance mode. Instead of seeing their win as your loss, you can start seeing it as proof that success is possible. That dreams can come true.

Pro tip? Shoot them a congrats message on LinkedIn or on Teams that’s genuine. Something simple like, “Hey, I saw your news, and I’m so pumped for you! You deserve it.” It might feel sort of forced at first, but over time, celebrating others becomes second nature. Bonus? When it’s your turn, they’ll probably be your loudest cheerleader.

3) Flip the Script on Comparison

The comparison game is the worst. We all know it, yet we hate/love to keep playing. But here’s how to win it (hint: by quitting). Instead of comparing yourself to someone else’s highlight reel, compare present-you to past-you.

Think about where you were one year ago. Two years ago. Five years ago. What have you learned? What have you achieved? Sure, maybe you didn’t climb 10 corporate ladders in 12 months, but did you grow? Did you pick yourself up after challenges? Did you try? Those wins, though quieter, are yours. Own them.

4) Channel That Energy into Action

Envy can either be a spiral of self-doubt, or it can be your wake-up call. It’s your choice. Instead of wallowing, use it to light a fire under you. What’s one step you can take today to move closer to your goals? (And no, “rewriting your whole five-year career plan” doesn’t count. Keep it small and manageable. Short-terms goals lead to long-term goals)

Sign up for that online course you’ve been eyeing. Email someone today and ask for insights about their career path. Set a mini-goal for the next month and crush it. You don’t need a 10-point plan; you just need momentum.

5) Remind Yourself of Your Unique Value

Here’s the not-so-secret secret of the workplace (and life): everyone brings something different to the table. It’s true. Just because Jane got promoted doesn’t mean you’re suddenly less talented, capable, or valuable. Don’t forget the stuff that makes you you: your quirks, your creativity, your amazing problem-solving skills in the morning when coffee is involved.

Write down a list (yes, literally write it) of five things you rock at doing. Anytime you’re feeling that monster creep in, read it. Fake confidence until you believe it.

Final Thoughts (and Pep Talk)

Listen, envy happens to the best of us. But instead of letting it control you, think of it as your slightly annoying mentor. It’s hard to hear, but it’s trying to tell you something important. Maybe it’s time to focus on what you really want or take that next step in your career, no matter how scary it feels.

Your path is yours alone, and it’s not a competition. Whether you’re climbing the corporate ladder or leaning against it, sipping an oat latte, and taking your time to figure things out, you’re doing okay.

The next time you see someone’s big win and feel that pang? Take a deep breath, smile, and remind yourself, “I’m on my way too.”

And hey, when it is your turn to shine? You’ll know exactly how to celebrate—not just yourself, but everyone else cheering you on.